As I was looking up new recipes to try, inspired by this week's goal (which I want to address real quick: this week, as you can tell by the meal plan, isn't really hitting what I want for this week's goal; however, by just focusing on NOT eating out and getting out of that trap we found ourselves in, I'm trying to get us back on track. I'll definitely be focusing on food more in the future), I got to thinking about ideals. I was pinning recipes to try and thinking to myself, "In and ideal world, I would do this, this and this", which got me questioning the notion of this "ideal world."
In the "ideal world" I was recently thinking about, Mr. LL and I would get up on the weekends and make a nice breakfast spread, trying out new breakfast recipes. On Sundays, I'd make a decadent dessert for us to have after a dinner we actually cooked and we'd have those dessert leftovers throughout the week. If we made grilled cheeses, they'd be on a good thick sourdough bread and they'd be filled with ricotta and spinach or something. However, the reality is this: on the weekends, we either go to our fave breakfast spot or we run and get McDonald's for breakfast. We rarely cook at all on the weekends, tbh. Our grilled cheeses are made with slices of American cheese 9 times out of 10 (but honestly, it's probably been two years since we've had grilled cheeses). Cooking exhausts me. The thought of cooking after a day of brain-draining work does not appeal to me in the slightest. And these days, I'M FREAKIN' STARVING by the time I get home and I don't want to wait an hour for something to cook in the oven. A lot of the time, Mr. LL ends up cooking the meals I plan for us to eat throughout the week because he gets home before I do and he's considerate of my UNENDING HUNGER.
In an ideal world, we'd dust. Yesterday, I stayed home to wait for the new fridge to be delivered and I did a lot of cleaning and organizing while I waited. After I had put away a ton of junk and picked up the obvious things (like dirty clothes, straightening up pillows and blankets, etc), I was hit in the face with all the dust and pet hair around the place. SO MUCH DUST. And the tumble weeds of pet hair? Yuck. What did I do about them? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I was whooped from cleaning out my closet to move artwork in there so we could put baby stuff in their places. And from doing ALL THE LAUNDRY, as well as the dishes and picking up the the house in general. Plus, I had to go grocery shopping. I'm not saying that in an ideal world, I would have dusted yesterday; but if we would just dust regularly then it wouldn't be such an undertaking to do it.
It's easy to get lost in "ideal worlds" but they just make you feel shitty about the reality you are faced with (and that you created). I try to not let "ideals" discourage me – like thinking "if it can't be like I dreamt it, then why bother?" – and instead inspire me. Give me something to shoot for but accepting the limitations of my lifestyle. Not to mention that you have to have a good dose of reality when it comes to these "ideals." The people who live them put in WORK to achieve them. It may seem effortless, but they prioritize these parts of their life and make time every single day to focus on them in some way. While I'd love to be dust bunny free with a freezer full of meals that I can make for us at the drop of a hat during the week, those things don't come first in the priorities for me. #1 for me is spending quality time with Mr. LL talking and laughing and cuddling. Somewhere WAAAAAAAAAY down the line comes dusting. No where is there a spot on my list for spending an entire Sunday prepping meals. So, just a reminder to anyone else out there who may be getting lost in their "ideal worlds," it's ok to aspire to an ideal, but don't let it control your life and/or psyche. Keep reality in check and do what you can with what you got.
